DeSoren Family

Our adoption journey with Jayme felt like a long one. We started in 2008 with a pre-adoption class and ended with finalization in June of 2012.

We thought our journey was over. But for over a year now Jayme has been requesting a little brother. And both of us feel that our family could be larger, Jayme’s request has started to become our own request and desire.

We started by E-Mailing our former adoption clinician and asked when the next adoption foundation class was. The next class was in February YAY! But it was all booked up, BOO! They did place us on the wait list and let us know they would call if they had an opening. It was a bummer and a reminder that this new goal for a new family member could take years to achieve.

About a week later we got an E-Mail asking if we would sit again on the post adoptive Friday night panel which speaks to very class we wanted to get into. We have done the panel now 4 times. The offer was that if we said yes they would move us off the wait list to the yes list. We jumped at the chance.

We E-Mailed our friend Suzanne and she agreed to babysit for the weekend of the training. The classes ran Friday night 6pm-9pm, Saturday 9am-6pm and Sunday 9am-6pm. It was a kinda huge favor to ask, but she said yes and we were deeply grateful.

We had a week or two of waiting and this gave us some time to talk to Jayme about what the adoption process would look like from our point of view. We wanted him to know that a little brother would not be moving in tomorrow and we wanted him to know what having a little brother would be like.

Jayme and Anthony talked about all the things that they thought would be different. About how we would have to share, and in a complete surprise to him, Jayme would not get to make up the rules for his brother to follow. Jayme is a slow processor so we know we will be having this conversation many times over the next few days/months/years before anything happens. But the funniest thing was at the end of the talk, Jayme was not sure he wanted a brother. It was very very cute to see the 7 year old logic in action.

The big day came and both of us met Suzanne at our house. She came over and after promising not to let Jayme juggle knives, we said good-bye and headed downtown to start over.

The classroom was the same, the chairs where a little better then last time and at least they still have toys on the tables for Anthony to play with. We picked the table in the back and quickly got a lashing from the teacher who we have now known for several years.

The class started and both of us kept our mouths closed and tried not to be the know it all’s in the room. But that was something that proved to be very hard when we were called to the front of the room and the adoption panel began.

We were joined by one other family (not retaking the class). The panel is asked to describe their family and get into some pretty deep emotional stuff. The class asks their questions and the panel does the best they can do to answer. The whole panel is scheduled to run for an hour, but always goes long. For us this time it was beyond weird, almost like talking to ourselves and remembering all the “fun” stuff we have to look forward to. After the panel and for the rest of the night, we were both pretty introspective.

The next day bright and early we rose and made a beeline for Starbucks. Being the cool kids that we are, we arrived 4 minutes late and had to do the walk of shame to our table. Lunch was at our old training class hunt Quiznos. While we sat a bit bored Jayme was playing with Suzanne’s grand kids having a blast. In fact on Sunday he got to go to the Children’s Museum.. our son is so spoiled.

Our class finally ended on Sunday and with it our weekend. For better or worse we are back at the start. Next step is filling out paperwork, writing up a new home study and coming up with another large check.

It began as things always do. Joshua had just served us a wonderful dinner of spaghetti  and meatballs. Both dad’s finished first and Jayme was struggling with his food. Some of the meds he is on, cause him to have ZERO appetite, so mealtimes can sometimes be a struggle.

As Joshua started cleaning up and washing the dishes, Anthony started to work with Jayme to get him to finish his last few bites. At some point, Anthony scooped up the last bite of spaghetti and was trying to get Jayme to eat it.

Somehow the raised fork, laden with spaghetti fodder slowly changed in both Anthony and Jayme’s minds into a PERFECT spaghetti catapult… their target Joshua.

Before the first shot could even be fired, Joshua gave a stern warning “Don’t EVEN think about it! along with a very unveiled threat that he would turn the sink’s hose on them it we did.

Jayme quickly downed the last bite and the two of us headed upstairs to rethink the strategy. They quickly found two of the ironing squirt bottles, both filled with nice cold water. A quick adjustment to each, moving from the light mist setting to laser sharp and deadly spray setting.

Slowly they crept down the stairs, Jayme giggling the whole way. Clearly the battle stress was too much for him…

As they arrived on the battlefield aka the kitchen, they took aim at the white t-shirt backside of  the enemy, Daddy Joshua.

A apocalyptic spray of icy watery death begin to rain down on a somewhat unsuspecting target. The only noise to be heard over the deafening boom of our squirt bottles was “What the Hell?” and a short “Oh it’s on now”

As our target turned and began his counter attack, Jayme and Anthony retreated to their base camp at the top of the stairs. A volley of measuring cup catapults, filled with water bombarded our camp. Thankfully due to the high altitude (the top of the stairs) most of the shrapnel covered the walls and soaked the carpet below them.  As each volley ended, Jayme and Anthony would return fire and try to get Joshua before he ran back to reload.

It was then that Benedict Jayme became a turncoat and ran down the stairs yelling “I am on your team now Daddy Joshua.”

Fearing defeat, Anthony had only one chance of survival. A hidden super weapon, a weapon of last resort. A large glass of water with LOTS of ice, sitting next to the iMac in the computer room, where he was working before being called to dinner.

As the new team of Daddy Joshua and Jayme stormed the mushy carpeted staircase, Anthony quickly ran to the computer room and locked the door. The sound of water exploding on the locked door rang through the house.

Anthony quickly transferred the ice from his reclaimed drink into a empty glass, saving it for later. He then took position by the locked door.

Scratching could be heard as Daddy Joshua used the key to unlocked the door. Anthony quickly opened the door and gave both of his assailants a quick spray from his squirt bottle and the full cup of icy water. Jayme shrieking with laughter.